Why I chose Tom

Why I chose Tom

            Sometimes I ask myself the same question. But Tom could sustain me unlike Gatsby ever could.   Sure he is wealthy now, but Tom always loved a life of luxury. I do love Gatsby and I always will but I love Tom now.

            I loved Gatsby but I couldn’t wait any longer. I needed love, protection, and the comfort of knowing I was constantly sustained. I needed to know that someone loved me. I couldn’t just rely on sheer hope.

            Sometimes I do wish I waited for Gatsby. Our love is eternal and my feelings for him never fully went away. Had he never hone off to war, I probably would have stayed with him. But he did leave and Tom was there. I will always have a very special place in my heart for Gatsby forever. He was the one true, undying love I had in my life. And he was always faithful to me. I do occasionally feel guilty I couldn’t have done the same for him and just waited.

            Tom and I have our issues of course and sometimes I do wish he was Jay. I mean, I spent my wedding night completely drunk out of my mind wishing it was Gatsby I was marrying.

I miss him all of the time. I miss the way he loved me unconditionally unlike Tom. Jay accepted me for who I was and I wish I was stronger so I could have waited for him, but I simply couldn’t